We are home alone again today. I was a little worried about poor Beckett and how he would fare with Coen being gone all morning. I forgot he is my kid who loves to play alone. He has been in heaven all day. He got to watch Star Wars without a fight. He has been holed up in his room moving furniture and building nests and screaming for mom to go away any time I stick my head in the room. Periodically he runs out, tells me his is playing hide and seek with kiki (his blankie) and Yoda. He then counts, races back to his room yelling I am coming, and then shrieks with laughter when he "finds" his friends. He also has come out to inform me that Yoda is afraid of mouses. I replied "He is afraid of mice?" "NO mommy MOUSES!!!!!". Beckett is a little intense for those of you who don't see him often.

I love this little guy.

While I was making dinner tonight Coen came in the kitchen and asked what the meat was from. I was a little nervous to answer this question. I was making a pomegranate glazed leg of lamb. And though up until now he has been fine with eating chickens and cows I wasn't quite sure how he would take to a cuddly little lamb. But lamb is an important part of my family culinary DNA. I really wanted him to like it. So with a little trepidation I said lamb- leg of lamb. Coen responds "What is lamb- like a baby sheep?". I replied in the affirmative. And then he danced around and around the kitchen for the next half hour begging for sheep leg- when is my sheep leg done? Can I eat sheep leg yet?

And when the meal was carved with his favorite baby rice (couscous) on the side he loved it. He had three servings. So there is another generation of lamb lovers. My Grandpa would be proud.

Alma on the other hand didn't not like it so much. I think it is something you have to eat as a little kid to like. But maybe I will try some braised lamb shank and see if he likes that a little better.

Is it weird I am going to put leftover lamb in Coen's lunch for tomorrow?

TJ is at BYU!!!!

We had a great time taking TJ out to BYU.

There were some highs:

Seeing Nate and Audra.

Walking TJ around campus.

Just hanging out with TJ and Becky.

Meeting JJ's new baby and her extended family.

Sundance- and more Sundance.

Shopping with sisters.

Setting up Tj's dorm.

Silver Lake with Kendra (Tj's very good friend who will be at UofU).

Finding the best green wool military coat for TJ.

Buying way too many books.

And the lows:

A speeding ticket (shhh I haven't told Alma yet) Actually my last speeding ticket was 10 yrs ago on the same part of I-80 with TJ- how weird is that!

Dropping my iphone in the toilet.

Becky forgetting her levoxyl.

Not getting to see Megan or Andrea.

TJ losing her wallet (found quickly).

And I didn't take any pictures because my camera stayed in the trunk until the last day- but I got some great shots the last afternoon. For the other days- you will have to go look at Becky's blog. And here they are:

Ahhhh, memories of Heritage Halls.

We may have been a little excited to be back in the old dorms unpacking TJ's kitchen.

TJ- I can't begin to tell you how proud I am of this young woman. She is intelligent, fun to be with, and a hard worker. I am so excited for all the new and exciting times ahead of her the next several years. I hope she has as many great memories from this time in her life as I do.

After unpacking we took TJ and her roomie (Emily) up to Sundance for one last meal.

Have I ever told you how much I love Sundance? It is a little piece of heaven on Earth.

And then we decided to make Becky deal with the heights and rode the chair lift- but sadly we didn't have time to ride mountain bikes back down. I have always wanted to do that.

Worth every penny. Breath taking isn't it?

And then we stuffed our faces (we may have eaten at this exact table the day before). As usual it was great- but I was a little sad we didn't get to eat at the Tree Room- since we were a little sweaty and too casual. The Grill was good though.

And stuffed our faces some more- peach cobbler- mmmmm.

It is That Time of Year

Today was Coen's first day of school. He was very "anxious and excited" about this new adventure. His teacher is one of Joseph's kindergarten teachers- Ms Mahaffey or- Ms Susan as Coen prefers to call her. We don't really know anyone in his class- so I was a little nervous too.

This was Coen- he was so excited to go to school!

Beckett didn't want him to go.

He was sad Coen was going- until it was time to pick him up- then he didn't want his Star Wars stopped. He said Coen could wait.

Coen has had a hard time with being separated from his brother this summer. When Loretta pointed out that Beckett wouldn't go to Kindergarten with him- he want to his room and cried for half and hour- so I was a little worried about how they would do. But at least today went okay.

This summer while discussing the upcoming adventure Coen asked what he needed to go to school for. I explained that it was to learn to read and write and do math and science and learn English. Coen responded "I already know English so I will study French." He also said he needed to go to school because he "didn't know everything yet."

We had a little 40 min orientation yesterday- and afterwards Coen said that "was okay- but it was too long." And today when i asked him how his day went he told me it was too tiring. And then we had the worst half hour ever- in which he yelled at me and told me I was being horrible to him and making him angry. Later when he had relaxed a little he told me that his favorite part of the day was listening to Peter and the Woof. We even watched it on youtube five more times when we got home- because he wanted Beckett to hear it. He was mad because he only had time to eat his carrot sticks at lunch and dropped his won tons and they wouldn't give him any milk. If you had called us this evening you would have heard a passionate complaint about his lunch time with many details. But when Dad came home all he had to say was that school is great and he can't wait to go back.

Coen was very serious this morning- he was so like me when I get a little OCD and anxious. It made me laugh a little when he was having his melt down over his name tag. He followed every little instruction very seriously and then looked around wondering why no one else was sitting where they were told to go.

And lunch ladies don't judge me- he asked to have the half eaten cob of corn be put in his lunch. That was his work- not mine.

Yesterday they gave us a questionnaire for the teacher to get to know our kids better. It got me thinking- or thinking some more anyways. What I really want for Coen this year is for him to develop a love for school. I want him to feel successful and smart- I want him to know he can accomplish new things with work. I am not concerned with if he is reading- or the smartest kid. Those things I don't care about- they will come with time. I want this year to build a foundation of self worth and a belief in his intellect and skills. I feel like this foundation will be what makes him successful and happy with his education in the future. I don't want him just to believe this because we praise him for any little thing. I want him to build when he feels overwhelmed but keeps working and succeeds in learning something new. I want him to be praised for his hard work and perseverance- not his intelligence or the result. Because and belief in yourself and the knowledge that you can work hard will be the best reward he could get from this first year in school. And some great time on the playground.

Hmm- I wonder if these will be future friends?

Trying to decide what to print for the entry way wall. And I am feeling uninspired. So instead I chose to play around with these two photos-

Vintage Joseph

Dream Girl Charlie

(remember running like that as a kid?)

Some Random Thoughts and a Report on the Weekend Activities

So I have been watching this show about Ryan and Tatum O'Neil on OWN. It is a very good show about a troubled parent child relationship- and I can't decide if it is good for me to watch or if it is not helping me at all. The father is a charismatic angry man- who can't see the affect of his temper, abuse and abandonment on his children at all. A little familiar no? And this is a show about them mending their relationship. And I am in limbo a little with my mom right now. I am at the spot I have been dreading- Chemo is over and now what? Where do we go from here. I don't think we are ready to really work on our issues that need some resolution if we are to go forward. But I don't really want to do that work with her. We are being pleasant for one another- doing our fake friendly thing. But this hasn't been a great place for me in the past. So I am at a cross roads and while I watch this show- I just keep thinking do these people really ever change? And how much do I have her stay in my life?

And on another note-(no pictures because I was camera cursed this day).

Alma wanted to go to San Francisco this weekend- but it was just too much for me. I was just too overwhelmed with everything I am trying to juggle right now- kids- work- trying to get the contractor to finish the remodel- the house- and getting away for the weekend just felt like more work. So at the last minute I canceled the weekend. So when we got up on Sat morning Alma informed us that we were going to have a family outing to the Railroad Museum in Old Town Sacramento. After we looked at trains, and climbed in trains, and played with trains we walked a little in old town. And by this I mean we went to the first of the thousand candy in a barrel stores and let the boys pick out stuff to their hearts content (except I put half of the stuff back after they picked it). The man at the register noticed that Beckett always picked things for him and his brother or tried to get one for the whole family. He told Beckett that he noticed how thoughtful he was and it made him happy to see such a good boy and gave him two pieces of chocolate as a reward. Wasn't that nice of him? And why are there so many candy in a barrel stores in four square blocks? Really! That is what people want?

At this point we got some water and walked to the Crocker Art Museum. There has been an Impressionist show there that I have been wanting to see and since we were so close the family indulged me. I was happy to see the special exhibit (why were they scattered hither and yon in the museum!?!) and play in the tot land with the boys while Alma tried to get a little time in the permanent collection. The Crocker Museum is having this great literature and art series with all these great educational and discussion programs that look so good- but they are all on Thursdays- the one day of the week I work all day. That was a little disappointing. But I got the book and will read it (3 chap. down) and have discussions with myself. Or Alma. But so far he thought I was saying Dr Goddard when I was talking about a famous womanizing OBGYN. So not exactly stimulating thoughts. And as usual my very favorite art- California landscapes- are always well represented at the Crocker. There was one of the visiting pieces from the Brooklyn Museum that Alma and I just loved of three women (I like to think sisters) in profile- breath

taking.

On the Heights by Charles Curran

And while the boys played in the tot room we discussed where to go for now for our private art collection. Alma and I both love art but our tastes are different- I like landscapes and some modern art- Alma likes portraits and very classical pieces. Museums are easy for us we wander and comment and disagree on aspects. We normally walk around separately and then meet to point out the pieces that moved us or made us think. It is interesting how often we both have something to say about the same pieces- or having my attention drawn to something I passed over. Any ways- it was a great day and we of course enjoyed seeing what the boys liked as well. One of the most interesting paintings was in the Impressionist American Landscapes- it was of an industrial complex by some water and rolling hills. The really interesting thing is so many of the landscapes painted during the industrial revolution ignored the changes in the landscape- they idealized the dream of the landscape that once was. Hudson River School especially typifies this. So it was interesting to see this painting.

This was one of my favorites from the show of Franz Bischoff. An Austrian born California painter. I really liked the allegorical painting titled A Spring Poem. But as usual my favorites were really his landscapes. This really typifies all the things I love about these early California landscapes- now if I only had a couple of hundred thousand dollars to buy one or two. Carmel Seascape:

A Spring Poem:

And this was Alma's favorite- End of the Working Day by Jules Brenton (french)

He actually liked this one art nouveau bronze cast that I can't find an image of. But he did come home and found

out what the last one sold for- and decided that we could have afforded it- hmm really we could afford a $10,000

statue in our house? Really?

So then we went out for dinner and drove home. Where we watched a funny movie Alma had put on netflix

because he thought I would like it and it had a bunch of actors I liked- he was right but now I can't

remember what it was called. And the best part of the day- Beckett wore big boy underwear all day and

stayed dry!!!!!!! Oh and I had a great hair day.

Highs and Lows

Work- ugh. I know I am a big whiner but it is so much harder working three days a week- and it is usually because somebody is out of town and so the time at work is a little more hectic too.

Good left overs for lunch. MMM Thai peanut chicken salad. Yum. And then I took a nap on an exam table. I may have seen the first patients of the after noon with a Naugahyde impression on half of my face.

Ikea- always a little frustrating but I am hoping this is our last trip for the remodel!

Going to the 4-plex putting on the last 5 cabinet doors in record time- but also noticing NOTHING happened today with the contractor. And I have a tenant very anxious to move in! Grrr.

Came home and Alma had put together the tropical spicy honey chicken salad I had gotten ready the night before.

And the house was clean- our babysitter is a saint.

And the boys had made us vases for our anniversary- have I mentioned the saint who watches my kids?

And Alma had roses all over the kitchen.

Laundry done.

Husband kissed. (actually I was whining about how tired I was and listed off all the chores I still had to do and Alma nuzzled my neck and said something like he would help me by kissing me some more, not the help I has hinting for).

Beckett screamed "I HATE YOU MOMMY" over and over until he collapsed asleep. (I put him to bed in his room and not mine.

Beckett saying that his body doesn't tell him in time to pee pee on the toilet and then he spanked his crotch area saying "Bad Penis".

Beckett may be a little dramatic.

2 weeks until Coen starts kindergarten. I am a little sad- okay a lot sad.

Must go to bed- I think I have 15 or so physicals on the schedule tomorrow- all teenagers. Oh the joy of the sport physical rush the week before school starts. FYI if you are calling to get that physical you have had the form for all summer 5 days before you need to turn it in- you waited too long- every other procrastinating mother is calling too.

Time for me to sleep too.